This Is A Thing? Really?

The Jesus-looking dude?
Not here. Check below.

Ran across a great story a couple of weeks back where a Jesus-looking dude (J-LD from now on) got tossed out of a darts tournament for looking too much like Jesus thus sending the drunken crowd into a frenzy of chants, taunts and heckling to the point of distracting the professional dart players, Phil "The Power" Taylor and Kim "The Hurricane" Huybrechts. Here are the videos of J-LD getting the boot:

First they sang, "Stand Up If You Love Jesus"

Then to the chants of "Jesus. Jesus. Jesus."
Elvis left the building.

Read the J-LD story here. When we read that the crowd numbered over 4000 it got us wondering what in the Wide, Wide World of Sports was up with professional dart tournaments and what in the hell would possess that many someones to pay good money to watch a couple of fat dudes toss darts. And, holy hell! We found out this darts thing is huge!  HUGE!

Here's Phil "The Power" Taylor's walkon.
Do they also talk sh*t like wrestlers do?
God! We hope so! Though we haven't found any video of it yet.

A modern era record crowd of over 9500 are whipped into a
frenzy at Dublin's O2 Arena at a Premier League of Darts event.

It's like a fu*king WWE event! Dart tournaments + 80oz pitchers of beer = bored drunks and we guess um, fun? It does look like everyone is having a really, really good time and maybe it's not just the beer. So good on them! Next up? The Premier League of JARTS!!!

Beer and large, metal darts!
What could ever go wrong?!

As kids we use to throw them over the house to each other.
You learn fear fast when you see
one of these bastards screaming down at you.

 Maybe that's why they banned them.

We Want Our F***ing Hockey

Here's a great video. Watch it.

We miss the NHL. Not the asshats like Gary Bettman, but the game, the players and the passion. Here's a good read about what a bunch of dicks Bettman and the rest of the owners are. This mess is their fault and their fault alone. No forgiveness for them. Ever. Fu*k 'em. Better yet, tax 'em. That'll piss them off good.

On a positive note the World Junior Championships are starting this week. Games to be shown on the NHL Network (Russia is hosting this year's championship. Hence the very early starting times).

Players are 19 & under. Future NHL'ers.

 Go USA! Go great hockey!

The Sky Sox New Manager Is...

...Glenallen Hill, the Rockies 1st base coach for the last 7 years.

We don't have a picture of Glenallen Hill so we found
this one of a young girl working in Glenallen Mill
in Winchendon, Massachusetts.

From Glenallen's Wikipedia page comes this gem, "Hill batted and threw right-handed. Hill was also infamous for his defensive escapades, which were once described by then-Mariners pitching coach Bryan Price as "akin to watching a gaffed haddock surface for air." He has also been referred to as The Juggler because he would struggle to hold onto a ball when he caught one."

It's a gaffed cod, not a haddock, but close enough.

PengoSports may have campaigned for Sal Fasano, but damn! That's pretty entertaining stuff! 

We have also been a fan of Hill's ever since 1990 when he went on the DL for once of the best injury stories out there:

click to embiggen

  Dude, we aren't a fan of spiders either. This story alone makes you okay in our book.

The answer is NO! HELL NO!
And now she's on the DL too.

Along with the new manager Hill, Dave Hajek was named the new hitting coach. He was in the same position with Tulsa last year and played with the Sky Sox in 1999, hitting .295/8/58 in 127 games. Welcome Glenallen and Dave! Good luck in 2013!

Baseball Card Vandals

All you need is an Tumblr account, a Sharpie and some crappy old baseball cards and you've got yourself some interwebs fame!

Check out the rest at baseballcardvandals.com

MLS Cup!

What cha doing today? Huh? Oh, watching college football. Yeah, I guess that's cool. But if you want to be really cool, really, really cool, how about watching FRECKIN' MLS CUP ON ESPN @ 230PM?!

Damn! That David Beckham sure dresses like a pimp!

This year's epic clash features the David Beckham led Los Angeles Galaxy hosting the Houston Dynamo and whoever leads them. This will be Beckham's last game for the Galaxy, he's off to Australia, or China, or wherever, to ply his aging trade. He'll be back though. He wants to own a team (St. Louis?) and has to cash to pull it off. God speed Becks!

Australian A-League soccer! Where the rules are a bit different!
Becks future home? We can only hope.

And...and...and best of all? No crap-tastic half-time extravaganza! Thank Christ! Enough of this bullshit! I came to see a game, not a concert, as expressed in the following garbage from last week's Grey Cup:

Gordan Lightfoot. He did not suck.
He went first and on a different stage
and got the hell out of there before this...

Marianas Trench.
Named after the only thing on Earth
that could hold the vast amount of suck that they suck.

Hadn't heard of Marianas Trench before the Grey Cup,
doubt I'll hear of Marianas Trench after the Grey Cup.

Next up, Carly Rae Jepsen. Two songs.
A sucky one I haven't heard...

...that she tried to sing without auto-tune...
sorry, as much as I hate auto-tune,
this girl needs auto-tune.

Just look at them fired-up Canadians calling for Carly, maybe.

And here comes the walking turd sandwich Justin Bieber!

Sporting some ink. Gives him a little more 'street cred'.

Didn't Canada use to have talented people they exported to the US?

So huzzah! to Major League Soccer for excising the garbage and now all we'll have to listen to is the chuckleheads break down the non-action in the 1st half. Not that I'm complaining.

Look at that MLS Cup!
It's HUGE!

Although this is more likely the 'true' MLS Cup.
It's NOT huge.