Happy Father's Day!

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!

Go get that prostate checked! NOW!

And, for a limited time only,
we promise they won't use a ball glove.

State of Origin 2 lived up to our vast expectations. NSW broke a four match losing streak to down the Maroons 18-8 to even this year's series. The decider is set for July 6th, same Bat-Time, same Bat-Channel.

Origin and Stanley Cup game 7 make for a happy Pengo

Speaking of Game 7, WOW! Tim Thomas just established the upper bar for how great a goalie can be in the finals. That performance will live in hockey history. And LuBrono? He may never recover (a lot like the reputation of the city of Vancouver. Most people thought it would be the ugly Americans tearing up Boston, nope. It was 'dem rascally Canadians).

The only Boston violence we noticed was at the Sky Sox game when a couple of Red Sox fans destroyed a chair in an on-field promotion. See the evidence below:

"Now cracks a noble heart.

Good-night, sweet prince plastic chair;
And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest."

The Boston hooligans

and the object of their spleen

Why couldn't they just pound on the mascot. You know, that worthless ba#tard who keeps ruining PengoSports' shots!

Something's happening on the other side of that leg

Stay out of my G#d-dammed shots or we're shipping you off to Vancouver with that G*d-dammed Finklestein sh%t kid! Son of a...

SWEET! Just SWEET!

Tonight! Well, Wednesday at 3:30 am, Queensland vs New South Wales at ANZ Stadium in Sydney in State of Origin 2! Set ye alarms ye scabs! Origin is here!

This Pirate Dude at the ballgame,

we guess, is an Origin fan

A huge PengoSports shout out to Russell Crowe, actor and the owner of the South Sydney Rabbitohs (PengoSports team of choice in the world of the National Rugby League), we Americans can now watch the State of Origin matches AND the NRL Grand Final, LIVE on Fox Soccer Channel (Comcast 125 in the 719).

Never experienced Origin? All we can say is WOW! If there is a more intense sporting spectacle PengoSports has not stumbled across it. Imagine the Super Bowl, World Series and NBA Finals rolled into the awesomeness of the Stanley Cup Finals plus a couple of monkey knife fights tossed in for good measure!

Origin game time 4:00 am, pre-game at 3:30 am. The Grand Final is on October 2nd. Pre-game to start at 330 am Mountain Time. Huzzah to Mr. Crowe! Huzzah indeed!

Thank you Mr. Crowe. Thank you.

And then, and then! Later Wednesday night, GAME 7. Boston. Vancouver. Hate. Cheap shots. A sieve. A stone wall. Punks. Greatness. The Stanley Cup will be awarded. What a series! What a playoffs! What a great sport is the hockey! PLUS! We guarantee a Lebron-Free experience (although is Luongo plays like he's in Boston he will become the Lebron of Canada).

GAME 7!

Rave on. Rave. On.

Murder at the Old Ball Yard! Murder Most Foul!

The other day, while attending the minor league baseball, PengoSports kinda, sorta witnessed a heinous attack on one of the River Cat relief pitchers. We didn't see the actual violence, but turned after hearing a sound of something wooden hitting something hard (perhaps an oaken cudgel whacking the player's head?) and noticed a player on the ground in the Sacramento bullpen writhing in pain, or something. We quickly snapped off a shot just in case CNN needed some proof and then went about our true passion, hunting for Sasquatches, and the next time we looked the player was gone. Probably dragged away by a Sasquatch, they are everywhere you know.

Let's breakdown the photographic evidence:

A. - The victim lying prone after the attack.

B. - The suspect making his sly escape.

C. - The shocked and appalled witnesses.

Find that kid in the grey shirt and we bet there's a bag of reward money waiting for you.

Now is the time to -

GUESS THAT HAIR:

Your choices are:

Bea Authur; John Maine; Alfredo Almezega; Josh Fields;

Brad Emaus; John Elway; Stu Cole; Troy Tulowitzki;
Willy Taveras; Stalin; Andrew Graham; Larry Fine;

Eliezer Alfonso; President Obama; Rex Brothers; Barbaro

you see me rollin they hatin

Next Time Let 'em See Your Face

How to catch a line drive in the left-center gap, by EY Jr:

First run real fast from center to the left-center gap.

When you get close, jump horizontally, like Superman, toward the ball.

Catch said ball (again, like Superman).

Find a nice soft place to land.

Congrats! You did it!

Does he make the catch!? YES!

(Say this out loud in a Marv Albert voice)

And to play us off, here is a big woman on the piano

being stalked by a couple of Lotharios.

Uniform. Unibrow.

Baseball is upon us so here is a press photo of Wally Moon, an old school player who had a pretty good career with the Cardinals and Dodgers in the 50's and 60's and also sported one of the all-time great unibrows in baseball history.

Almost Vulcan in his intensity and appearance.

His baseball cards are epic:

Eye-black for the tops of your eyes.

Stops the glare from the dirt and grass,
might just catch on.

Almost like he doesn't know it's there.

Like a prank taken to a whole other level.

We mean a whole, whole other level.

And now, for a bonus, PengoSports' favorite two baseball cards:

Keith Comstock's 'baseball to the groin' classic from 1989.

Bob Uecker's 'I'm batting left handed' wonder card.

One of the few cards in the PengoSports Vault.

The Perfect Shots!

Sports photography is all about being in the right place at the right time and being prepared for the shot. Well, well, well. If that is the case PengoSports just nailed these two!

Pretty sweet! It's all in the reflexes.

Well, this is a bit awkward. Is it Prostate Awareness Month?
(Number blurred to protect the innocent)

Lidsville!

"In the middle of the summer, in the middle of a park,
There began a great adventure for a boy whose name was Mark
He had come to see the magic man, along with all the children and
'twas so began the day that Mark was never to forget..."

New PengoSports feature, the "Hat-O-the-Homestand":

We will post several of the best hats from the ballyard each homestand and you, yes you, get to vote for the bestestess!

Here are our first two three! entries:

 A) The Tie-dyed Hipster in a Bear Bryant hat.

 B) The Human-Jack with black nails wearing an Angels' shirt.

C) Mr. Vandalized-Head! Wow! And out in public! 

Tough choice. Vote in the comments below.

Good luck and God speed...

"...If you have a chance to go-go there
You'll be glad you did, 'cause
Everybody who goes to Lidsville really flips his lid"

Quick Sherman! To the Wayback Machine!

Baseball is in the air! The Sky Sox open their season today and PengoSports would like to share this humble look back on the team's first incarnation in 1950.

Story and pictures from the
May 22, 1950 edition of Life Magazine

click on pics to embiggen

And because we care, here is a picture of a freaky totem:

I love to watch you sleep.

Speak of Yourself in the Third Person Day

To honor the greatness and self-indulgence that is the Super Bowl, the Government of the United Nations of the World has declared February 6, 2011, A Salute to Illeism: Speak of Yourself in the Third Person Day.

Illeism - The act of referring to oneself in the third person. Someone who practices illeism is an illeist. Adjective: illeistic. Etymology: From the Latin, "that man".

So, at your Super Bowl party, proclaim proudly your name, annoy your friends and let the world know the joys of irritating speech and become the illeist that you've always wanted to be.

Hockey Commercials - 3 Hella Great Ones!

New SportsCenter commerical: Ovie's a spy!

A couple of dancin' Sedins.


A classic. Simply a classic. If you've played you know the 'smell' all too well...