Broncos Open Camp!

Hey! It's the Broncos! And they're doing stuff!

Yeah! Football! Um, practice. The Denver Broncos began training camp today so that means only 42 more days of repetitive practice reports, meaningless games played by faceless players we'll never see again and a whole lot of nothing until football really starts (first game isn't 'til Thursday, September 5th at 630pm vs them stupid Baltimore Ravens). Dammit!

Anyway. Here's some footage from Day 1:

Super Bowl here we come!

Here they are hanging Joe Flacco in effigy.

Quick! Hide! The cops are here for Von Miller's stash!
Wait. That's legal now in this state...
Quick! Hide! The NFL is here for Von Miller's stash!

Okay. You know the drill...Let's go. Broncos. Yada yada yada.

Sumo-riffic!

Omedetōgozaimasu Hakuho!
July's Grand Sumo Tournament
Makuuchi Division Champion
with a record of 13-2.
(Check out his web-card here)

Like Sumo? Did you watch any of July's Grand Sumo Tournament from Nagoya that the great Nakuho won? No? Want to watch September's tournament from Tokyo? Well TV Japan on Comcast (channels 199/963)/ Dish Network (channels 9989/9991) broadcasts each of the 6 Grand Sumo Tournaments LIVE! .

January - Tokyo

March - Osaka

May - Tokyo

July - Nagoya

September - Tokyo

November - Fukuoka

Granted, the LIVE coverage begins at 100am Mountain Time, but at least it's on. And it's LIVE! Sweet!

Nothing says Late Night TV like
LIVE Sumo broadcast in Japanese without subtitles

TV Japan's website.
Doesn't this site just POP?! WOW! Here's my money!

PengoSports has spent a lot of late nights watching Sumo tournaments. They are always entertaining, but the commentary is only in Japanese so it takes a bit to pick up the nuance of each match.

Not too many dudes can pull off the paper belt look.

Looks like a slow dance at the Sumo School.
Can't help think that everyone watching is judging these two.

TV Japan costs $24.99 a month! We know that's a lot of Yen for TV you probably won't watch all that much. Instead go to YouTube for all your Sumo/strange Japanese TV needs:

Who Throws A Shoe?

There come those times in baseball where you say to yourself, "Hell. I've never seen that before." Well, the July 10th game between Colorado Springs and Sacramento provided me with one of those moments when River Cats' pitcher Andrew Werner had one of his shoes fly off during a pitch and the batter, I don't remember who was batting for the Sox, grounded out after shattering their bat on the same pitch. There was crap flying all over the infield.

Sacramento's Andrew Werner and his lost shoe.

Not the best pic, but imagine first a shoe, and then bat parts flying everywhere. Now dial it down a couple of notches because it was, after all, just a shoe and a couple a pieces of a bat. Looked like something out of the US Festival. Just thought I'd share.

It was a lot like this, except without all the people
and add in a shoe and parts of a baseball bat.

How To Do Postgame Interviews

This is how every team should do post game, on-field interviews:

Well played Bearcats. Well played.

Now for locker room interviews one need look no further than video bomber extraordinaire, Ryan Kesler of the Vancouver Canucks:

MOZART FRICKEN JOHNSON!

Sweet pic from the 1920's of a very helpful, and user friendly, device to help the ball-retrievers on the golf courses of this great land of ours (plus the dude's first name is Mozart Johnson. MOZART FRICKEN JOHNSON! Names now days suck).

Photograph shows caddy Mozart Johnson wearing "the latest safety device for golf courses"
fashioned from wire-mesh and worn over the head and upper torso to protect
"caddies and ball-retrievers from wild golf balls".

Still going to hurt like a bitch if it hits you in the arms or bounces off the turf and nails Mozart in his "Johnson". Just saying. This contraption could use a bit of improvement. 5 of 10 Pengos!

Watching The Rugby League

Hey! What channel is the footy on?

How do you watch Rugby League on the TV and the interwebs you ask? Well, if you have Fox Soccer Plus (DirectTV - 621/Dish - 407/Comcast - A**holes) you pay $14.99 a month and just watch away. Don't have FSP? Join the club. So we have to watch replays of the English Super League on the Fox Sports step child FuelTV (Comcast - 128/DirectTV - 618/Dish - 398). Usually Mondays at 1100am and the same game again on Thursdays at 200am.

We don't get Sky Sports. We don't get shit.

And now we can watch LIVE National Rugby League action from Australia on THE NRL's web channel on Livestream.com starting with this Thursday's curtain raiser between the South Sydney Rabbitohs and the Sydney Roosters.

PengoSports are HUGE supporters of the Rabbitohs!

Upcoming games:

Thursday, March 7 - SL - St. Helens v Leeds 200am
Thursday, March 7 - NRL - Rabbitohs v Roosters 205 am
Monday, March 11  - SL - Warrington v St. Helens 1100am

Enjoy the games. And remember this is Rugby LEAGUE and not Union. Better game. Translates better with the sports culture of the USA. Check it out.

We Want Our F***ing Hockey

Here's a great video. Watch it.

We miss the NHL. Not the asshats like Gary Bettman, but the game, the players and the passion. Here's a good read about what a bunch of dicks Bettman and the rest of the owners are. This mess is their fault and their fault alone. No forgiveness for them. Ever. Fu*k 'em. Better yet, tax 'em. That'll piss them off good.

On a positive note the World Junior Championships are starting this week. Games to be shown on the NHL Network (Russia is hosting this year's championship. Hence the very early starting times).

Players are 19 & under. Future NHL'ers.

 Go USA! Go great hockey!

The Sky Sox New Manager Is...

...Glenallen Hill, the Rockies 1st base coach for the last 7 years.

We don't have a picture of Glenallen Hill so we found
this one of a young girl working in Glenallen Mill
in Winchendon, Massachusetts.

From Glenallen's Wikipedia page comes this gem, "Hill batted and threw right-handed. Hill was also infamous for his defensive escapades, which were once described by then-Mariners pitching coach Bryan Price as "akin to watching a gaffed haddock surface for air." He has also been referred to as The Juggler because he would struggle to hold onto a ball when he caught one."

It's a gaffed cod, not a haddock, but close enough.

PengoSports may have campaigned for Sal Fasano, but damn! That's pretty entertaining stuff! 

We have also been a fan of Hill's ever since 1990 when he went on the DL for once of the best injury stories out there:

click to embiggen

  Dude, we aren't a fan of spiders either. This story alone makes you okay in our book.

The answer is NO! HELL NO!
And now she's on the DL too.

Along with the new manager Hill, Dave Hajek was named the new hitting coach. He was in the same position with Tulsa last year and played with the Sky Sox in 1999, hitting .295/8/58 in 127 games. Welcome Glenallen and Dave! Good luck in 2013!

Stamps! Argos! Grey Cup!

It's on! The Calgary Stampeders will take on the Toronto Argonauts in the 100th Grey Cup next Sunday, November 25th, at the Sky Dome in Toronto!

Look at how HUGE the Grey Cup is!
It's HUGE! HUGE!!!
How will they lift it?!

There will be Mounties to welcome and protect you! And other Canadian stuff, you know, like maple syrup, toques, mooses, beavers, back bacon and donuts from Tim Horton's!

Watch the Grey Cup! Eh!

The pre-game starts at 400pm MST on NBC Sports Network (Comcast 56/DirectTV 220/Dish 159) with Canadians Burton Cummings and Johnny Reid headlining (I honestly have no idea who either of these guys are) and Justin Bieber (I love this clip!)...

...Carly Rae Jepsen (the chick that sings that annoying Call Me Maybe song), Marianas Trench (again, no idea) and Gordon Lightfoot (to capture the Great Lakes shipping disaster fan demo) doing something during the half-time show thingy.

Half time entertainment!
Canadian Style!

So watch it eh? The Broncos v Chiefs game is at 1100am, so it'll be long over by 400pm and the afternoon NFL games are just a sackful of suck anyways.Tell them PengoSports sent you!

The Canadamoblie will welcome the world
to the magic that is the Grey Cup.

Where Wee Smalls Jets Once Roamed Free

Hey! Didn't you use to hang out at Falcon Stadium?

Any one out there that's a long-time Air Force Falcon football fan? Do you remember something like the the plane in the above photo at Falcon Stadium? I swear there were others too. Small replicas of a F-4, F-15, F-16 & Space Shuttle that use to putter about in the South end zone during games? I can only find vague Sasquatchesque photos of the damn things and want to confirm that I didn't dream up the whole, wonderful thing.

Nose of a F-15 peeking out behind a
Eric Faison INT against Navy in 1990.

Tail fins of a F-15 in this old school Falcons photo.

The sidelines now are domain of photographers, military brass and other hangers-on. It'd be a nice distraction to see one of us get run down by a little jet every now and then. You know, for the kids? Just sayin'.

Don't Forget Your Skirt

It's Not Manny Ramirez Night! Giambi and Tulo are in the house! What a night it was! (except for the crushing 9th inning loss). 

NOT Manny Ramirez, Sacramento's Bruce Billings, 
pitched well but got a no-decision
on NOT Manny Ramirez Night

Tulo K'd...

Strike Three

...hit a bomb...

No need to duck NOT Manny Ramirez!
This one's going to fly a long, long ways.

...and Giambi singled.

Still a sweet stroke.

But the story of the night was in the bullpens. The River Cats pen seemed bored and did some artistic tossing of the rosin bag.

A nice, tight rotation for this rosin bag

While in the Sky Sox pen...FEAR RULED THE DAY!

Look out! It's...a...um...ball.

Who needs a skirt here?
1. Jeff Marquez
2. Eric Junge
3. Austin Bibens-Dirkx
4. Dan Merklinger

How about it Drew?

1. Skirt. A big, not hip, frilly skirt.
2. Skirt. Just a regular skirt that's all.
3. Ballplayer. Cool with Drew.
4. Billy Bad-Ass! Too cool. Even for Drew!

And you G-Mullet?

"Ditto" to what "Drew" "said"
"COOL"

 

And you, Sacramento radio voice Johnny D.?

Not now. I got a scoop interview with the Urinal Deuce!

NOT Manny Ramirez Day!

Manny Ramirez will NOT
be at Security Service Field
on NOT Manny Ramirez Day

Wednesday, August 29th will be NOT Manny Ramirez Day at Security Service Field. Manny Ramirez will NOT be there, but the FAKE Manny, Bruce Billings, will be starting for the Sacramento River Cats so get there early and cheer on the one, the only FAKE Manny Ramirez you'll see this year!

Bruce Billings will be the NOT Manny Ramirez
on NOT Manny Ramirez Day

A great lineup of actors, celebrities and athletes will be on hand to NOT honor NOT Manny Ramirez on NOT Manny Ramirez Day. Some of the invitees include:

Pirate Guy!
(NOT confirmed)

Tiny Cap Wearing Guy!
(NOT confirmed)

This clown.
(NOT confirmed)

Billy Ray Cyrus!
(NOT confirmed)

TULO!
(CONFIRMED!)

G-Skullet!
(CONFIRMED!)

Eliezer Alfonso
(NOT confirmed)

Jason Giambi
(CONFIRMED!)

Kenny Bania
(NOT confirmed,
but still GOLD Jerry! Gold!)

See you on Wednesday for the greatest NOT Manny Ramirez Day ever!

Imitation MANNYSPRINGS!

The River Cats are back! Manny Ramirez is not. In June, shortly after turning Colorado Springs into MANNYSPRINGS, Manny asked for, and was given, his release by the A's. Where is he now? No idea, but I think I saw him hanging out downtown pestering passersby about their spare change. Could've just been a guy with dreads, but you never know.

Any-who, we still will have the next best thing...

...that's right! Imitation Manny, Bruce Billings, is scheduled to pitch for Sacramento on Wednesday the 29th! Get your tickets early! It's bound to be a standing-room only crowd!

MANNY! Manny. Manny?

Nope! You fooled us again Bruce Billings!