What The?

Strange things were afoot in the Sacramento River Cats bullpen during the August 23rd game against the Sky Sox. River Cats reliever Kyler Newby hooked a giant rubber band to fellow reliever Hideki Okajima and then proceeded to "crank" Okajimi up.

Is Okajima a robot? An alien (space not foreign)? Just a kinky dude who likes to get his kicks in public? Are all the River Cats robots? The entire A's organization? We may never know, but they do seem to win an awful damn lot. Hmmm...where are Scully and Mulder when you need them?

Author's depiction of Hideki Okajima
in what might be his natural form.

No use steering now. The end is near.

The Sacramento River Cats celebrate another
series win against the Colorado Springs Sky Sox.
Damn robots.

Sweet Double Play Pic!

The last picture of what would have been a sweet series
with Drew Garcia turning the double play over Sacramento's
Anthony Aliotti. Someone, or something, got in my way.

Okay. Maybe not. Stupid umps. Always ruining my shots.

So anywho...here's a cat lady that was at last night's game:

This was my dream...
this is my nightmare.

What do you say Intern Dan?

Red shirt? Space condo? Space phone?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Dammit! They got to you too! Be gone! Away now! Back to Jersey with your own nerd-self! (though I did hear you kind of like that "cat thang" she had going on. Good for you if that's what you're into. Now, still be gone! You sick bastard!)

Johnny D!

Sacramento radio legend Johnny Doskow
entertains Sky Sox fans with a medley of hits
from his Outfield days during a rain delay
at Security Service Field at Mile High.

Next year the Sky Sox are moving from the PCL Pacific Northern to the American Northern division. That means that the teams they faced 8 times a year at home will now only come round Security Service Field at Mile High for only 4 games every other year. So, we will only get to see some of our favorite PCL radio personalities every other year. Radio personalities like Sacramento River Cats' superstar Johnny Doskow.

An angry Johnny Doskow knows what he doesn't like.
And Johnny Doskow doesn't like this.

Johnny was the lost forgotten 4th member of the 80's pop sensation The Outfield, known for their mega-hit Your Love,

Johnny, two years are two too many. We'll look forward to seeing you in 2015 (unless the schedule plays out that we'll see you next year and then in 2016)!

Pop sensation and radio god,
Johnny Doskow!

Whatcha Doing?

There's living on the edge, and then there's LIVIN' ON THE EDGE! I'm guessing this would fall under the "neither" category. 

Ryan Ortiz #6 - "Hey. Whatcha doing?"
Mysterious Glove Fixin' Guy #46 - "Fixin' my glove."
 Ryan Ortiz - "Can I watch?"
Mysterious Glove Fixin' Guy #46 - "Sure. I guess."

Pedro Figueroa #32 - "Mind if I watch too?"
Paul Smyth #35 - "Me too! Me too! I want to watch!"

Kyler Newby #16 - "You fixing your glove?"
Mysterious Glove Fixin' Guy #46 - "Yeah."
Brian Gordon #18 - "Ooo! Ooo! Can I watch?"

Baseball Is Boring

In honor of the Sky Sox taking on the Sacramento River Cats tonight here is a shot of a really bored Sacramento bullpen from July 9th:

From left to right - staring at the ground guy, trimming his nails guy,
bored bullpen catcher guy, so bored he can't stop yawning guy,
staring off into space guy, this is even boring in Japanese guy &
this is even more boring as Japanese translator guy.

BONUS! The fans! - blonde chick, bald dude &...

...a dude with poor posture wearing a t-shirt that
has a nakedish He-Man guy riding a bear/tiger thingy.

He looks bored, but you can't be bored with a t-shirt like that. He's got to be so intense he just looks bored.

Who Throws A Shoe?

There come those times in baseball where you say to yourself, "Hell. I've never seen that before." Well, the July 10th game between Colorado Springs and Sacramento provided me with one of those moments when River Cats' pitcher Andrew Werner had one of his shoes fly off during a pitch and the batter, I don't remember who was batting for the Sox, grounded out after shattering their bat on the same pitch. There was crap flying all over the infield.

Sacramento's Andrew Werner and his lost shoe.

Not the best pic, but imagine first a shoe, and then bat parts flying everywhere. Now dial it down a couple of notches because it was, after all, just a shoe and a couple a pieces of a bat. Looked like something out of the US Festival. Just thought I'd share.

It was a lot like this, except without all the people
and add in a shoe and parts of a baseball bat.

Don't Forget Your Skirt

It's Not Manny Ramirez Night! Giambi and Tulo are in the house! What a night it was! (except for the crushing 9th inning loss). 

NOT Manny Ramirez, Sacramento's Bruce Billings, 
pitched well but got a no-decision
on NOT Manny Ramirez Night

Tulo K'd...

Strike Three

...hit a bomb...

No need to duck NOT Manny Ramirez!
This one's going to fly a long, long ways.

...and Giambi singled.

Still a sweet stroke.

But the story of the night was in the bullpens. The River Cats pen seemed bored and did some artistic tossing of the rosin bag.

A nice, tight rotation for this rosin bag

While in the Sky Sox pen...FEAR RULED THE DAY!

Look out! It's...a...um...ball.

Who needs a skirt here?
1. Jeff Marquez
2. Eric Junge
3. Austin Bibens-Dirkx
4. Dan Merklinger

How about it Drew?

1. Skirt. A big, not hip, frilly skirt.
2. Skirt. Just a regular skirt that's all.
3. Ballplayer. Cool with Drew.
4. Billy Bad-Ass! Too cool. Even for Drew!

And you G-Mullet?

"Ditto" to what "Drew" "said"
"COOL"

 

And you, Sacramento radio voice Johnny D.?

Not now. I got a scoop interview with the Urinal Deuce!

Imitation MANNYSPRINGS!

The River Cats are back! Manny Ramirez is not. In June, shortly after turning Colorado Springs into MANNYSPRINGS, Manny asked for, and was given, his release by the A's. Where is he now? No idea, but I think I saw him hanging out downtown pestering passersby about their spare change. Could've just been a guy with dreads, but you never know.

Any-who, we still will have the next best thing...

...that's right! Imitation Manny, Bruce Billings, is scheduled to pitch for Sacramento on Wednesday the 29th! Get your tickets early! It's bound to be a standing-room only crowd!

MANNY! Manny. Manny?

Nope! You fooled us again Bruce Billings!

 

Two Mannys?

With a tear in our eye, we say, 'goodbye!'

Peeking in the RiverCats' dugout during Sunday's game something didn't seem right about Manny:

Here is Manny being Manny from Game 1...

...and Manny from game 4. When did he start wearing glasses?

 Hmmm? Looked odd with the naked eye. Really looked odd zoomed in.

And he looks kind of doughy. What the?

Wait a second! That's not Manny! IMPOSTER!

Who is that fake-dreadlocked man? And what has he done with Manny?
 

The imposter inspects his bat like Manny...

...wanders the dugout aimlessly like Manny...

...he's even wearing Manny's batting gloves,
protective elbow guard and doo-rag...

Does Manny have a doppelganger?

The face is starting to look familiar...

...is it? Could it be?

It is! It's ex-Sky Sox pitcher Bruce Billings!
Now sporting a beard and glasses to fool the masses.

Damn! Manny's going to be so pissed! Bruce is going to die!

Bruce Billings give Manny back his stuff.
Manny seems cool with it.

No hatin', just lazin' on the fence together. Manny is a good dude.

Bruce lived. Manny hit a couple of balls hard and seemed to be a good teammate. Good luck with your comeback Manny. Thanks for a fun weekend. You deserve to go out on your own terms. Hope you get that chance.

Manny-Apocalypse

What's happening in

Well, Saturday was Todd Helton bobblehead night!

I've always had the feeling Todd didn't like me...hmmm?

People love them bobbleheads! There is one already on eBay starting at $29.99, or buy it now for just $59.99 w/ free shipping! Wow! That's almost as cool as this thing (or not):

The horror! The horror!

It's got to be the legs, or the transition of the legs to the tomato body, or the lack of pants that push it over the normal, creepy mascot vibe into the 'get the hell away from me' mascot vibe. Let's just chalk this one up in the 'I Do Not Like That Thing' category okay? 

Hernan Iribarren makes a fine running catch
in front of the Sky Sox bullpen.
Kennil Gomez, standing, shows his appreciation.

Onto the game. Cats crushed the Sox 10-2. Cats always crush the Sox. The RiverCats are a damn good baseball team. And Manny Ramirez was a 40 year old Manny Ramirez. Going 1 for 6 with a weak single to rightfield.

Manny singles to right even while playing with a cat trapped under his helmet.

Manny watches one of his 'foul' balls.

Just when I think I get my shot of the season (see the Why I shoot Post) I stumble on a better one the very next day...

The Zombie Manny-Apocalypse is upon us!

Why I Shoot

Moment like this are why I shoot:

Sky Sox shortstop Tommy Fields turns two
despite the slide of Sacramento's Brandon Hicks
and the distraction of 2nd baseman Hernan Iribarren
kung-fu-ing himself into the play.

You work into position. Then you wait. And wait. And wait. Most of the time you get squat, or pictures of bullpen shenanigans...

The Sacramento RiverCat bullpen doing a lot of sitting around and stuff.

...or pictures of Manny Ramirez doing stuff...

Double-Dutch. Man-Ram style!

...but sometimes your preparation and work pay off. You have the perfect light, the right play and an awesome shot (see above). This is why I shoot.

Sky Sox 3rd baseman Brandon Wood takes a poop on the field.

Speaking of squat, you mostly get this. Mostly.